Friday, October 23, 2009
i feel like a total failure.
不管我做什莫，我都用心去做了。
所作的一切，却都比不上别人。
我好累。我没有什莫期望，我也不敢想了。
希望有大，失望越大。
我好累。。。只想放下一切，到一个很远很远的地方。
再见了。
希望你能好好过，开开心心。
告别了。
Labels: the last wish...
♥Oh, so vintage... 2:50 AM
Thursday, October 22, 2009
i cant believe how much i've grown to hate ASAHI! it was my fav beer last time.but lately, it has grown to become a super cui beer. Every gulp down is so bitter,so unbearable. Really disappointing.Gonna finish the 3rd installation of 6 packs man!im gonna stop buying it alreadY!SPENDING too much on numbing which dun WORK!can someone just shoot me?
life's a joke seriously. now we all know whose the most popular out of nowhere. now we noe whose the hot property. now we all know whose the ones that really matter. Jiayou guys.Stop pushing her around and respect her as a lady yeah! Nice girls hard to find...so cherish and may something good happened to anyone of you.
i've done something which i shouldn't and i totally hate it!i need to get into the mood now but its not there yet. i cant afford to lose steam this sem!its dangerous!
LS commented that i sound happy today! do i really sound like im a happy man? sounds like vs feel like deep down aint the SAME!but wat's good is,i still look happy.Not too bad.
*you're still the one that i cannot let go*
♥Oh, so vintage... 1:28 AM
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
'its especially strange when i see you cry.the comfort that i wanna provide can never reach you.'
my mood is like the weather right now. its a damn cold night and once again,im downing my ASAHI to make me go to sleep!that's after doing my assignment and i should be glad that i managed to finish my part. =))
finally had the social sec handover.it was nice seeing those cheerful ppl again,brings me a smile when i see those ppl!i always wanted to make u happy but it always end up that it doesn't go well.i really wonder why isit so.Like totally.
i really dun wanna think anymore.but i just cant though i know i need to stop thinking!*PLEASE WAKE UP n STOP DREAMING*
♥Oh, so vintage... 1:11 AM
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
im learning to appreciate. Appreciate every small little thing in life. Appreciate all the small little things that people do for me and that has always been the case. Understand how much effort sometimes people really go all out or even take time off to make my life alittle better, happier. For that, i thank you my frens!
*searching for that happy feeling once again,alone*
♥Oh, so vintage... 12:45 AM
Monday, October 19, 2009
All I hear is raindrops
Falling on the rooftop
Oh baby tell me why’d you have to go
Cause this pain I feel
It wont go away
And today I’m officially missing you
I thought that from this heartache
I could escape
But I fronted long enough to know
There ain’t no way
And today
I’m officially missing you
[Chorus]
Oh can’t nobody do it like you
Said every little thing you do
Hey baby say it stays on my mind
And I, I’m officially
[Verse Two]
All I do is lay around
Two ears full of tears
From looking at your face on the wall
Just a week ago you were my baby
Now I don’t even know you at all
I don’t know you at all
Well I wish that you would call me right now
So that I could get through to you somehow
But I guess it’s safe to say baby safe to say
That I’m officially missing you
[Chorus]
[Bridge]
Well I thought I could just get over you baby
But I see that’s something I just can’t do
From the way you would hold me
To the sweet things you told me
I just can’t find a way
To let go of you
[Chorus]
It official
You know that I’m missing you
Yeah yes
All I hear is raindrops
And I’m officially missing you
♥Oh, so vintage... 10:45 AM
this is sucha joke!after 6 cans of asahi,im just high and still suffering from insomnia. i dunno wat i'm thinking but im just not myself today.
im really really very upset. i really wat to do and im really disappointed!you're very impt to me but i just dun seem to be impt to you at all! i just feel that you treat others better than you treat me!m i really that bad?i nv blame you for that and i just wish that you would just give me some response be it good or bad. i dun like the uncertainty with you not giving any response at all.
you asked me what happened but it was really the wrong time to asked abt it with other s ard. and im disappointed cos you did that becos others asked u to! you actually dun have to if you dun feel like it.i never wanted to force you.all i wish that you'll be happy. As for now,somehow i feel that you've not given up ur past and with all that's happening lately,i just feel that we're drifting apart. im really heartbroken but i guess u wont noe it afterall.
suffering from a mega headache noW.but i just cant get to sleep!it hurts,esp deep down my heart.arghx...would it be better to leave u alone right now?deep down i still noe that i still love you but i just cant bear to see u upset. i dun like to see a undecisive you.i would rather you reject me right in my face if it make things easier for you. i rather i'll be the one that suffer than we suffer together with all the pressure coming down on you.
*im sorry i have to leave.i just wish for you to be happy.that's all for now.*
~you're the first girl that managed to break me down totally.but i dun blame you for im weak when it comes to you!~
♥Oh, so vintage... 4:27 AM
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
sad + disappointed = ME!
really feel damn low morale now and its not the right time totally!arghx...really wonder wat the hell is wrong!perhaps...i've lost everything.ego hurt...
however,im happy for my freshie Junhao and Michelle!may ur love for one another bloom and grow!!! <3
♥Oh, so vintage... 11:39 PM
Monday, October 12, 2009
today, a question was posted to me and it really got me started to think.
"Who are the people that you value most???"
it took me awhile before i could struggle to come up with some names. i realised i value myself more than i value others right now however, it didn't take me long to come up with your name as the second name.
Have you guys stopped for a min and thought of this question seriously? And yes,i did that today!
♥Oh, so vintage... 9:18 PM
Sunday, October 11, 2009
a storm is stirring. feels a sudden lost of motivation in everything! feels like getting away, running away from everything!EVERYTHING... i really dunno wat's happening!i cant just die without knowing why?
♥Oh, so vintage... 10:04 PM
its once again one of those emo nights whereby i feel super duper horrible. there's so much happening here and there that i think im really going crazy.i never ever felt this horrible before.
it has come to my attention that while others are improving like crazy,im actually moving backwards.I really hate that and its not wat i wan. Im happy that you guys have improve but sad to say,i've really like lost everything.TOTALLY! so wat the hell is wrong with me man.i really have no idea.i really hate this and i really feel like giving it up when i feel that my body is falling apart.
its been a tough week for you i noe and its gonna get tougher. sometimes, i really dunno what's running thru ur mind. Its really very sianz to see you get irritated over Z and i know to a certain extent,its partly due to my presence. i just hope that i could help alleviate ur burden and be there to give u support whenever u need it. however, these hot and cold moments really send me hanging in the mid of nowhere. though i pretty wanna talk abt this but then i knew this isn't the right time to give you even more undue stress and pressure with z coming all over. i really dunno what else i can do now to make u feel better and im totally at a lost right now.
besides that, im totally disappointed in you guys.TOTALLY...i really dunno if i could still face you guys like before but im disappointed with how you guys couldn't handle such problems and even think of the consequences of carrying out these actions. I really cant believe that you guys could be manipulated to this extent. I really m disappointed. Have you spare a tot for the team? Hall cheer is just HALL cheer.Do you really have to go to that extent? why not you guys just join cheerobics this year as well?
i think i should stop mj-ing!have been losing big time lately. 11 consecutive sessions! i really dunno wat the hell is wrong with me man.
*i wanna get my TTH back.i wanna get my str lib back.i wanna get everything back!!!arghx...PLEASE DUN GIVE WAY!*and think of it,should i join the group stunts this year?do i have the ability and time to train?arghx...
♥Oh, so vintage... 3:53 AM
Saturday, October 10, 2009
seriously hope its a new start for everyone. Its really sad to see how events unfold right before your own eyes. Silently praying for you guys...all the best and i hope things will change for the better bah! its definitely another kind of learning experience for a better and stronger person. JIAYOU JIAYOU!!!
just came back from training!B-tosses today AGAIN!i feel like im dying. My shoulders are yelling like no body's business.it's good that our group stunts is pretty much stable alreadY esp with that new pair of KAEPA!!!Happy man!i wonder when will my shoulders give way!n i seriously wonder whether i'll have the chance to go for the gym lessons!hahaha...im so excited! i wanna do back tuck, i wanna do front and backhand spring, i wanna perfect my roundoff and hopefully someday i'll be able to do ROBT!!!
i must remember that there's always a reason to something and sometimes,its better not to know.Just believe and have faith and trust.i also learn that,not everyone is as nice as it seems!
♥Oh, so vintage... 1:24 AM
Friday, October 09, 2009
really wonder wat's going on?!?!?!?!?!?
♥Oh, so vintage... 4:09 AM
Sunday, October 04, 2009
im a much happier person now. i've gotten myself out of cheer,hockey and vball already! might sound like a real bastard but i guess that's the price to pay to become a free man. afterall, i've offered as much as i could already and i guess its time that i cant give so much without thinking of myself anymore.
all i wan is just to be happy and go luckY!that simple.
u guys can judge me in watever way u wan it cos i do the same thing.say wat u wan for all i care, u wont be able to see things in the way i do!
sharon says im visibly happier noW.true true,probably not becos i've more free time. i do agree and i hope things will just get better.never been so happy before like totally!thank you for everything and all those that have been very concern.ppl like victor and yan as well as my PT zhangmei!THANKS alot ppl...great to have u guys ard.
*im a hall cheerleader no more*
*im a hall vballer no more*
*im a hall hockey player no more*
*im a free man now!!!YEAAAAAaaaa*
thanks for all that had happen, i've gotten myself a valuable lesson!
♥Oh, so vintage... 11:51 PM
